Hannah for hire

Yesterday, we had Hannah come over and take some wonderful pictures! We thought a studio would be too much for Zac to handle, so we hired her to come to our house instead.

She only took 1,389 pictures. Here's four. (Give Hannah a call. She is available for hire!)

Time In's

Well, it's official:

Time in's are out and time out's are in. (Did that make sense?)

Wednesday was not a good day. We had several temper tantrums and it seems that the more we held him, the more frustrated and desperate he became. In truth, if I were mad about something, the last thing I would want we be pinned down by someone 10x as big as me.

Because we feel the attachment thing is going so well, we opted for a time out approach yesterday. (Sitting him on a chair and walking away). We still remain within view of Zac, so he knows we haven't left him. This went 1,000 times better yesterday. He truly wants are attention and approval. Therefore, time outs are something that he responds to very well.

We'll keep perfecting the art of our parenting, but we feel like yesterday was a break through day.

Before he was about 95% great child and 5% scary tantrum boy. Yesterday, I'd say he was 99% great child and 1% normal tantrum boy. Much much better.

Report Card

Now that we're back from Russia, I will most likely be ditching the twice a day entries. We'll probably be going back to every other day... er something.

So naturally, people are asking how Zac is doing, so I thought it would be fun to draft a "report card" format:

Sleep: A+
Zac has been consistantly sleeping through the night from day one. The most amazing feat that he accomplished was our first day back home when he managed to sleep from 10:00pm to 6:00am even though we were all tremendously jet lagged. I'm not sure how he pulled this off.

Many of you have commented about my blog entry regarding how we witnessed Zac falling asleep those first few times. I'd like to let everyone know that he has already transitioned into a more "normal" sleep habit. (i.e. whining when it's time to go to bed, playing a bit before he goes to sleep... not exactly "good" behavior, but certainly more "normal"). Nevertheless, the whining and playing are very minimal. Bottom line is that he is a great sleeper. Very quiet too. No snoring.

Eating: A+
Zac is a great eater and doesn't appear to be too freaked out with our American food. He really likes bananas, but isn't real crazy about any other fruits. Go figure.

Temper Tantrums: B-
Today was our first day without a full blown "Zac attack". (Yea!) There were a few 2 year old moments but nothing like what he's capable of. Each day is getting better and better. We are so encouraged by his sweetness and ability to handle what must be a very stressful time in his life.

Playing with Siblings: B+
One of the biggest surprises we've had during our time home is how helpful Hallie and Jake have been. They probably don't even realize they are helping, but there have been countless times when we've been trying to steer Zac in a particular direction, and he doesn't necessarily listen to us, but he does follow whatever his big brother and sister are doing. (i.e. coming in for dinner, washing his hands, brushing his teeth, etc.) All 3 are getting along very well. We have had only 2 very minor cases of hitting.

Attachment: A
We are making leaps and bounds on a daily basis. As I look at various "check lists" that are out there regarding attachment disorders, I see that we have very few things to worry about. The only major issue that we've seen from Zac is that he has a tremendous tolerance for pain. (which is indeed on the list of attachment issues). This kid has taken some serious spills in the last two weeks and for the most part, he simply gets up and keeps right on going. No tears. No hugs from mom or dad. (We try, but he resists during these times) But this seems to be the only "big thing" that we're seeing. For the most part, our lives are full of cuddles, snuggles, kisses, hugs, eye contact, etc.)

Cuteness: A+

Sweetness: A+

Humor: A+
Zac is showing himself to be a little clown. It's fun to watch his new faces and noises emerge on a daily basis.

Talking: A+
I'll let you watch this one for yourselves.

(Editor's note: At the end of the video, Zac walks away like a "silly man". Please don't be worried that he has something wrong with his legs.

Wow

All I can say is "wow". Zac is doing so great. Today was a really good day. We only had two temper tantrums. He is doing so much better with the concept of "not getting his way". Additionally, Katie and I are working hard to make sure he doesn't have "too much control" over things. As a result, we are doing things for him that he can certainly do on his own. (Brush his teeth, get himself dressed, feeding him) This is all b/c a lot of books tell us that giving in to his need for control now (which he certainly has) can lead to bigger problems when he's older.


Think of independance and attachment on a spectrum. Most biological kids come "pre-attached". Therefore, everything that parents do is done in order to move kids across the spectrum from attachment to independence. For Zac, however, we must do things a little "opposite" of conventional parenting. I can't begin to express how much better things have gotten now that we're home. He is accepting when we take things away. He is allowing us to brush his teeth. (which really takes a lot of trust!) Even the "time-in's" have toned down a notch. (No more hitting and biting.) In fact, we're finding that he is clinging to us quite hard during these time-in's. It's as if the tantrums have nothing to do with us, and everything to do with whatever it is that he needs to work though. Katie and I have had no problems holding him during these screaming fits. I thought it would be tougher, but it's really not.

PICTURE TIME:

As you can see, Zac is fitting well into our theatrical, singing family.


Here's our 3 kids plus cousin Jillian

Once again, no problems fitting in with the "baseball boys". (Except that he holds the bat upside down... we're working on that!)

Editor's note: Don't worry, Jake is hitting a wiffle ball in this picture. Although the ball did almost smack Zac in the head with that particular line drive.
At first, Zac was a bit confused as to how the pool works. He stripped himself naked upon entry into the water. But he eventually figured it all out!
Wearing big brother Jake's hat and shoes. He's already immitating a lot of what Jake does. The ultimate sign of brotherly love!

Pictures and time ins

Our kids are getting along amazingly well these past 2 days. I'm very proud of all 3 of them for how they've behaved.

We've continued to have a few temper tantrums from our little Zac, but we've employed what we believe to be a good working strategy. We've now developed what I would call a hybrid time-in and they seem to be going well.

The ignoring thing didn't seem very effective. This resulted in unresolved conflict which led to bigger and more frequent tantrums. At one point, we even attempted to give him a time-out" by himself in his room. Within about 3 seconds of shutting his door, we realized that this was absolutely NOT the right thing to do. We don't want give him any illusion that we're "leaving" him at anytime.

Therefore, we've settled on time-ins.

Doing great

Welcome to the new format of my blog:

It's called, "Holy cow, I have 3 kids now" format.

It's quick! It's short! It's to the point.

We're doing great.

We're HOME

Whew! We made it home.

And I'll have to say that the dreaded, "Flight from Hell" went surprising very well. For most of Tuesday, I had a pit in my stomach thinking about what a rough day Wednesday was going to be. But much to my delight, Zac was awesome yesterday. At the beginning of the day, I was mostly only thinking about the 12 hour flight from Moscow to Atlanta - but the reality is that the day was SOOOOOO much longer than that. Before we even started flying, we had 3 hours in the Moscow airport waiting in line after line after line. Zac did great the whole time. He played and laughed and never once ran away from us. (One of my biggest fears)

Then we boarded the planed and he immediated slept for almost 2 hours. For the next 5 or 6 hours, he was awake - but was definately in a good mood. He played, watched TV and walked up and down the aisles many times. We also went the bathroom about 5 times, but I didn't mind. It was something to do. Therefore, he was active - but certainly he was not being bad or out of control. Believe it or not, he ended up sleeping the last 4 hours of the flight.

We ended up with about a 2 1/2 hour layover which was more than enough time to get through immigrations, customs, and baggage. It was during this time that we had our one and only Zac attack of the day. In truth, it may have been to our advantage because it was right when we were going through a security check. He was screaming so much that they basically just let us through without checking anything. Katie and I later laughed at how much you can get away with when you've got a crying child.

The second flight went great. Again, he mostly slept the entire 2 hour flight.

Therefore, I'd give our little guy an A- for the day. Only 1 breakdown is pretty awesome for ANY 2 year old.

When we landed, we were greeted by the large majority of our family. (and a few friends) It was so awesome to see everyone and especially Hallie and Jake. Man, I missed them so much. It chokes me up again just thinking about how wonderful our homecoming was.

We went against what all the books said and let Zac go around and give everyone hugs. He was so sweet the whole time. Additionally, we could tell that he really liked Hallie and Jake. While in Russia we had been showing him pictures and talking about them the whole time - and I really think he understood who they were.

We came home and all the kids started playing. What a joy it is for a parent to see their kids playing together. I think Zac was a bit overloaded, but nonetheless, still very happy.

It's good to be home. So now it's 2:00 in the morning and everyone is asleep but me. Hmmm...