Sunday, May 4, 2008

Wow

All I can say is "wow". Zac is doing so great. Today was a really good day. We only had two temper tantrums. He is doing so much better with the concept of "not getting his way". Additionally, Katie and I are working hard to make sure he doesn't have "too much control" over things. As a result, we are doing things for him that he can certainly do on his own. (Brush his teeth, get himself dressed, feeding him) This is all b/c a lot of books tell us that giving in to his need for control now (which he certainly has) can lead to bigger problems when he's older.


Think of independance and attachment on a spectrum. Most biological kids come "pre-attached". Therefore, everything that parents do is done in order to move kids across the spectrum from attachment to independence. For Zac, however, we must do things a little "opposite" of conventional parenting. I can't begin to express how much better things have gotten now that we're home. He is accepting when we take things away. He is allowing us to brush his teeth. (which really takes a lot of trust!) Even the "time-in's" have toned down a notch. (No more hitting and biting.) In fact, we're finding that he is clinging to us quite hard during these time-in's. It's as if the tantrums have nothing to do with us, and everything to do with whatever it is that he needs to work though. Katie and I have had no problems holding him during these screaming fits. I thought it would be tougher, but it's really not.

PICTURE TIME:

As you can see, Zac is fitting well into our theatrical, singing family.


Here's our 3 kids plus cousin Jillian



Once again, no problems fitting in with the "baseball boys". (Except that he holds the bat upside down... we're working on that!)


Editor's note: Don't worry, Jake is hitting a wiffle ball in this picture. Although the ball did almost smack Zac in the head with that particular line drive.
At first, Zac was a bit confused as to how the pool works. He stripped himself naked upon entry into the water. But he eventually figured it all out!
Wearing big brother Jake's hat and shoes. He's already immitating a lot of what Jake does. The ultimate sign of brotherly love!

9 comments:

Anonymous said...

Oh my gosh, Jake looks like a giant compared to Zac! Wow... he looks so much bigger and older now!

I love the updates and the pictures!

Hannah

Anonymous said...

Can't wait to meet the little guy soon. Love the photos. It is fun to see the family of 3 or rather 5 that you have become. Bet you keep catching yourself counting 3 now when you go places. Love you all, Aunt Anica and Uncle Jeff

Jennifer C said...

Thanks for sharing those pictures...it is hard to remember the Horner family without Zac! I am so glad that things are going so well. You two are amazing parents. Hallie, Jake and Zac are 3 very blessed little kiddos. I hope we can talk soon. Love you guys!
Jenn

Happymom4 aka Hope Anne said...

Wonderful!!! Thanks for keeping us updated!!! I bet you'll find that having older kids helps Zac's adjustment to you all a lot. ;-) I know it's been helpful for us with our Dd!!

Deb said...

Such a cutie! He really does seem to be fitting in well.

The Reade Family said...

It is so exciting to see your kids all together. What a blessing! We are so excited to see that things are going well!

Love,
The Reades

Linds said...

I love the pictures of your complete family now! Zac fits right in and looks so happy... what a blessing it is for your sweet kids to have such incredible parents like you two! We look forward to hearing more!!

Sher said...

It sounds and looks like everything is going great! By the way, while you were in Russia was there ever a time when you were both dressed in black and yellow or broke out into a musical number?

Dan and Alicia Marlowe said...

He's just so totally one of the gang. I'm glad you are experiencing success with the stradegies you are employing during his transition. Your three 'match' a lot better than my three do. Beautiful family God has given you. Remember His promise to give wisdom generously to all those who ask for it!